I'm sitting around, doing almost nothing. Sure, I need to clean up before people come over this evening; I've got laundry that needs folding and ironing; I've got papers to grade. But I'm sitting here instead, blogging. At that, I'm being more productive than I was 20 minutes ago, when I was playing online games. But the day is mine, and I can do with it what I want. That is what I've been missing.
For a fair portion of the last 8 years, half or more of my weekends have been forfeited in one way or another. For years, we held a roleplaying game on Sunday afternoons. Every other week, I'd work at a fast food chain, because they always need people on Saturdays. Or we'd go to a Magic tournament, taking up hours on end. A few weeks ago, my husband and I decided we needed to cut back on the busyness and just relax. I spent the whole weekend reading and knitting just because I wanted to. I didn't even check email for two days. I got a small piece of my life back, and it was wonderful.
Rather than stressing out so much, I think I need to take attitude lessons from my dog. Right now, she's dozing in the bathtub (because the porcelain is nice and cool), and her only care is that we're not playing with her right this second. So I feel no regrets that I'm sitting here doing not much more than enjoying the blues on the satellite radio station, listening to Ray Charles, Floyd Dixon and B. B. King. The music is good, my coffee was good, lunch gave me a happy belly, and if all isn't right with the world, at least this little corner is doing okay.